Let me first say thank you to the Tracy Myers for a wonderful email and a great honour.  Visit the http://www.onlinehumanresourcedegrees.net/conflict-resolution website to read the very nice comments on this blog.

The title of this blog is a great line from Stephen Fry on George tonight.  Brilliant man with lots of insight into the human condition.  I am often impressed by the guests on George Stombolopoulous’ Show.  He is also a brilliant man and an effective host.  I met him once and was very impressed by his friendly smile and handshake and his genuine interest in people, including me.

We are all equally afraid and uncertain … maybe of different things.  We also demonstrate that fear and uncertainty in different ways.  Some people move toward us in their anger.  Some move with and some move away.  For some the trigger is found in the past.  For others it is the present and for others the fear is the results of what we think lies ahead in the future.    Here is a reminder of the 3 by 3 chart that helps you detect the direction and orientation of people in conversation.  It will also show you where people find their fear and uncertainty.  Knowing that makes it easier to address the fears and uncertainty with an appreciative POWER tool.

The PULSE BEACHs –9 Perceptions

Beliefs, Expectations, Assumptions, Concerns and Hopes

Orientation   and


Heart –Past







Move toward


Success -3

Moving toward with the past. Fill the room with their emotions,their heart.

Power -8

Moving toward in the present. Fill the room with their physical presence,their body.



Excitement -7

Moving toward with the future. Fill the room with their ideas and innovations, their head.


Move with



Move with the relationship from the past. Feeling what

should be felt.




Move with the present.

Doing what

should be done now and following the rules.



Moving with approval to the future cautiously. Thinking what

should be thought.




Move away



Moving away or withdrawing into the past, into the heart.




Moving awayor withdrawinginto the present, the body.


Moving away or withdrawing into the future, the head.